Conscious choices are choices made from self awareness and high self esteem. Self awareness in this case is being aware of our inner world as well as our outer world. Our inner world is made up of our feelings, thoughts, beliefs and our spiritual self. Our outer world is made up of external things, places and people.
When we make these choices we are accessing our inner world to help with this choosing.
An unconscious choice is like a reaction to external circumstances. We immediately react to something one has said or done without thinking or feeling or questioning.
1). We order a milkshake when we know we are lactose intolerant. We don’t pay attention to our inner world which says if we drink this milkshake we are going to get a gut ache later. It’s as if we want the short term instant gratification at the expense of the long term pain (gut ache).
2). We go on a spending spree completely unaware of whether we can afford the things we bought. We may feel a bit guilty but we don’t pay any attention to what we feel, justifying our actions with something like “I deserve it”.
3). We go out and buy a $400.00 photocopier with all the money we currently have, when we don’t have any or much food in the house.
4). We say Yes to going on a blind date, when what we really want to do is stay home and watch TV because we are so tired.
1). We order an iced tea. We would like a milkshake, however the resulting gut ache from being lactose intolerant turns us off that particular idea.
2). After checking the budget, we decide not to go out and buy stuff. We simply can’t afford it.
3). We see an ad for photocopiers and decide to go out and buy one. We also realize that there’s not much food in the house after checking the fridge so instead of a photocopier, we buy groceries.
4). A friend wants to know whether we want to go on a blind date. We politely refuse citing tiredness from the day’s activities.
So you see the main difference between these choices is paying attention to our inner world. Our inner world acts as a signpost giving signals about what to do or not do. Without this incredibly valuable tool we would be lost in our outer world completely at the effect of our external circumstances.
Also, with high self esteem, we value ourselves and want to feel genuinely good, so we make choices that reflect how we feel. This is the main difference between conscious and reactive choices. One builds us up, the other tears us down!